The 5 Day Gratitude Project – November 18-22, 2018

I originally created The 5 Day Gratitude Project as a video series over on my Instagram leading up to Thanksgiving.  The topics I share are designed to encourage us to explore a deeper sense of gratitude.  If you read this on the day this post goes live, the videos are still up.  Though, I want to still provide the messages in written form because I think they are valuable topics worth revisiting.  You can also read over these topics at your own pace over the course of 5 days. If you saw my videos or choose to do this project, let me know what you think of it.  I may just bring this back for Thanksgiving week next year! 😉

Before you start:

If trying out this project after the original date, I recommend focusing on one topic each day for five days straight.  Just read over the topics and see how they resonate with you as you go about your day.

Also, this project is designed to be as straightforward and easy to follow along as possible though I do recommend a journal to hand write your answers to the homework assignments for days 2-5.  Alternatively, you may also use the notepad in your phone.  The homework assignments are optional but highly recommended!

Day 1: Mindfulness in the Present Moment

We’re in an age and time where we look to online content or scroll through social media for a quick distraction to provide instant gratification.

Let me ask you: are you right now watching these videos while you’re in the company of someone else  Do you have these videos playing while you’re watching TV or working on any other task?  We train ourselves to think we can multitask and we can to a certain extent.  Though, the more you divide your attention, the less you will be able to accomplish and, even more, the less you will feel accomplished. 

Think of it: when you create a list of things you want to do, are you more likely to be able to check off all of the items of that list if you try to work on them all at once?  I’ll let you consider that.

Okay, so what does any of this have to do with mindfulness?  The issue I’m trying to highlight is that we’re lacking real presence in what matters.  The more you flood your mind with distractions and so-called entertainment, the less energy you have to focus on yourself.

That’s all I have for today.  I greatly believe breathing exercises are a way to develop presence.  I’ll leave you with a link to one of my favorite videos.  Tune in to what’s important, guys.

HOMEWORK:

All you need is 10 minutes and this video.

Day 2: Making the Most of What You Have

There is a hindering thought that crosses my mind and probably all of our minds at some time or another.  It is a reassurance that we give ourselves that we will be able to get what we want LATER.

The thought might play out like, “Oh, if only I had more money” or, “One day I’ll have the chance to travel”.  The worst of these may be when you resign to your circumstances and say, “This is just the way things are….”   

The thing is: if there is something you want then there is really nothing stopping you from going after it.  I know we’ve all heard that before but it’s true.

There is a concept called wabi-sabi.  It’s a Japanese term primarily used to describe the perfect imperfection in art and aesthetics.  Beyond that, it is also knowingness that things won’t ever be completely right or completely perfect.  Life, like art, is flawed but there is beauty in that imperfection.

Life is going to continue and obstacles are going to continue being placed in our paths—that is the nature that is the imperfection of life.  Embrace the idea that life is transient and imperfect and so are you. 

Whatever your situation is, build from there.  Life is hard but we can still accomplish everything we want if we are willing to work for it.  So, there’s never a perfect time to go after what you want—there is just now.

HOMEWORK:

1. What is something you’ve wanted but haven’t gone after because you feel like it is too hard to achieve?
2. Could you perhaps be creating your own obstacles?
3. What is something you can do right now to change that?

Day 3: Comparison as a Tool

Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy”.  I’m sure I’m not the only one who can attest to feeling a little unhappy when witnessing others successes.

Yesterday, we spoke about making the most of what you have but a related concern is: What do I have? It’s easy to look at or talk to other people who seem to have their life all together but, remember, nothing is perfect. 

For a while I would look at others and find myself feeling less than satisfied with the way my life was going.  At the same time, if you asked me what it is that I wanted I wouldn’t be able to give you an answer.

Put aside fame, power, money, opportunity, and anything else and get to the root of it.  It took me time but I realized that what I found appealing in other people’s pictures and stories is the idyllic state of content existence they seemed to be in.  And that is what I wanted.  I think with a foundation of mindfulness, this is also easier to achieve.

Still, we all want more, right? So, what is it that you want?  Hold that thought in your head.  When you know what you want and what you’re working towards, you need not be affected by anyone else’s path because you’re on your own amazing journey.

Now, if you are thinking: Melanie, that’s all fine and dandy but what if I don’t know what I want?  I got you.  I’ve been there myself.  This is where I like to see comparison as a tool.

What I started to do was look at things others were doing that I liked—and I still do this.  I pick out anything from habits to career steps to spiritual practices.  The key here is to look to others for inspiration but not for complete replication of their person.  I take what resonates with me, leave what doesn’t, and use it to build a framework for my own self-improvement.  In this case, I might not know what I’m working towards but I am building practices that feel right to me.  The more you live in line with what feels right to you, the closer you’ll be to actually figuring out what you want.    

HOMEWORK:

1. Who is someone that you admire?
2. What is that person doing that you like?
3. List any practices that you’d like to implement into your own life.

Day 4: Self-Love

Tell me, does the term might make you feel like rolling your eyes because self-love sounds like a cheesy term out of a therapy session you didn’t sign up for?  It is okay to feel that way but I hope I can encourage you to reconsider what self-love means after today.

Part of what makes us hesitant to shower ourselves in self-love is the lingering discomfort we have with ourselves over past and present situations.  I hope some of the tips I’ve shared the past few days have resonated.  When practiced regularly, they encourage a positive mind frame so that we do not rely as much on the hindering thoughts and behaviors we may have embraced.

If you recall the Day 1 Gratitude Project topic, I mentioned how being mindful in the present moment is important because it allows us to tune into ourselves.  When you spend even a few minutes alone, without distractions, you’re at an advantage to explore the things that make you YOU.  I do believe that quiet reflection like meditation is extremely beneficial for this but, before you click out of here, there are other methods, too. 

Spend time doing something that will benefit you—no matter how small.  You can cook yourself a delicious and nourishing meal or light a candle that smells appealing to you.  You can do a workout that YOU LIKE or here’s one of my favorites: changing my bed sheets.  I swear there is nothing more satisfying than crawling into a bed with clean and fresh linens and wrapping myself in the sheets.  It’s these small gestures that will remind us of the things that speak to our soul. 

Cultivate a relationship with yourself!  You are an individual with many habits, dreams, quirks, and preferences—many of which you may not even realize you have.  I wish I could reach out to every single one of you, give you a hug, and tell you that you are loved.  But that wouldn’t be enough to ignite self-love.  The only person who can cultivate that is you. 

Let go of past burdens and accept yourself for who you are in this moment.  And if there is still something holding you back, then I hope tomorrow’s topic provides the affirmation you need.

HOMEWORK:

1. Write three specific things that you like about yourself.
2. Write down two things that speak to your soul! (Consider even small gestures.)
3. Write one thing you will do today to provide yourself with love—and hold yourself accountable!

Day 5: Worthiness

You are enough and you are worthy.  Let that sink in for a moment.

For the final day of The Gratitude Project, we’ll be discussing worthiness.  Too many times we equate our worthiness with empty things like how much money we have in the bank or the amount of hours we put in at a day of work.  Maybe even the compliments or critiques of others are an influence.  I won’t say these things don’t matter but they don’t have anything to do with your worthiness. 

As a disclaimer, I’m not saying we shouldn’t appreciate those things but we need to know we are enough right now.  You are enough.  You have purpose, you are important, and the fact that you exist and are breathing air right now makes you worthy.  This isn’t a trick or a metaphor, this is simply a fact.

Let me break this down: you are worthy of respect; you are worthy of any dreams you aspire to bring into fruition; you are worthy of having a voice; most of all, you are worthy of love.

YOU GUYS.  This brings us to the conclusion of the 5 Day Gratitude Project!  The things I’ve shared this week have been practices that have been big in changing the way I experience gratitude.  I am always trying to work on myself and I am grateful for the ability to learn and improve and share some of that with you. 

I hope you’ve gathered something of meaning during these past 5 days.  This has been a project really close to my heart and I am so appreciative that you’ve let me share it with you.  Let me know what you think if you’ve followed along!  

This was everything that was touched on over these past 5 days.  Read over any topics you may have missed in video form or feel free to revisit this project and participate in the challenge on your own time.

HOMEWORK:

1. Finish this sentence with whatever feels right: I am worthy of ________________________.
2. What advice would you give to someone struggling to feel content with themselves? Could you use this same advice?
3. Who are you thankful for? List however many people come to mind!
4. Foster relationships. Reach out to at least one person who you haven’t spoken to in a while but whom is important to you.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I’ll leave you with a final thought:

The world won’t stop turning without you in it…but that doesn’t mean you can’t be memorable.  Your words, your actions, and your kindness live forever in the hearts you touch.

Thank you so much for being here!

Xoxo,

Melanie